Aparna – The Soul of My Journey

Today, I celebrate Aparna — not just her birthday, but the extraordinary woman she is. Every year, I write about her, and every year I find myself discovering new layers to her grace, strength, and quiet brilliance. This post is not just a tribute; it’s a love letter to the woman who has been my partner, my compass, and my greatest blessing.

The Beginning of Us

I still remember the first time I saw Aparna — calm, composed, and radiating a quiet confidence. There was something about her that felt grounding. While many of our common friends dreaded engaging with her (she was called Kali – not for being divine, it was more due to the perceived Ferocious nature) Over the years, that feeling has only deepened. She’s not just the person I married; she’s the person who has helped me become who I am.

In our early days together, I was often caught up in work, travel, and ambition. Aparna never complained. She simply made sure that home was a place of peace, warmth, and unconditional support. I’ve often said she’s the reason I could chase dreams without fear — and I mean it.

The Backbone of Our Family

Aparna is the emotional backbone of our family. She remembers every birthday, every anniversary, every little detail that makes people feel seen and loved. She’s the one who ensures that traditions are honored, that relationships are nurtured, and that no one ever feels left out.

While she had been a great parent, what was surprising to all of us was the she is a greater grandparent. A new priority (notwithstanding what I will write later on). Her small world now revolved around Anay, the lovely gift from the Divine who came into our lives 2 1/2 years ago.

Her Quiet Wisdom

Aparna doesn’t speak to impress — she speaks to connect. Her wisdom is never loud, but it’s always profound. I remember a particularly difficult decision I had to make at work. I was torn, overthinking, and restless. When you are spoilt for choices, a good night’s sleep becomes a distant dream. Aparna listened patiently and then said, “Do what lets you sleep peacefully at night.” That one line cut through all the noise and helped me choose clarity over confusion. Decision was made. It was not just about Money, Honey was the message she stood by.

She has this ability to distill complexity into simplicity — not because she’s trying to solve things for me, but because she trusts me to find my way. Her faith in me has often been stronger than my own.

The Rituals That Bind Us

Our Sunday mornings are sacred. Uppittu, Avalakki, Dosey, filter coffee, and short conversations — about everything and nothing. It’s in these moments that I see the depth of our bond. While I may find it difficult to tell this on the face, it is easier to express it here – Aparna’s presence doesn’t demand attention; it offers comfort.

Her Many Roles, Her One Essence

Aparna is a wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend — but she’s also a seeker, a thinker, and a woman of substance. We have so many to endorse this – Divya, Vishnu, Sindhu and so many of our Kids. She reflects deeply (and gets hassled even when things are fine), and refuses to evolve 😛 She’s the kind of person who’ll attend a spiritual discourse in the morning, debate a social issue (based on her FB feeds) in the afternoon, and watch a movie she will never understand in the evening.

She’s not defined by any one role — she’s enriched every role she’s taken on. Her priorities were very clear – it revolved around a few of us, whatever it took.

Her recent Pilgrimages to Sabarimala revealed an hitherto unrealised inner power. While we all thought she was frail and weak, she shocked us all. With His blessings she did it so easily, not once but two times in couple of months. Hats off!!!

The Unseen Sacrifices

There are sacrifices Aparna has made that I’ve only understood in hindsight. The career opportunities she let go of, the personal dreams she quietly shelved, the countless times she put others before herself. She never made a show of it — she simply chose love, responsibility, and grace.

I remember once asking her if she ever regretted not pursuing certain things. She smiled and said, “I chose what mattered most to me. And I’ve never looked back.” That’s Aparna — always choosing with clarity, always living with conviction, especially when it came to Children.

A Birthday Wish from the Heart

May this year bring you the peace you so generously give others. May you always know how deeply you are loved — not just today, but every single day.

Happy Birthday, Aparna.
From all of us

20454 & the Pleasant Math

As you got a year older and as we age and our hair get grey, it is stock take time – It is 20454 days, Yes! a cool 20.5K days that the rising sun has seen you and 14,593 days since we met. And even cooler 12,173 days since we decided to travel our lives together.

What a Journey it has been! Obviously amazing with a fellow traveler like you the journey has to be exciting. As you celebrate your 56th birthday, I am reminded of all the beautiful moments we’ve shared and the many more to come.

Rock Solid behind all of us whom you touched

You were not just my wife, or not just mother to wonderful children (both biological and manasik) but everyone’s best friend, confidante, and partner in every sense of the word. Your laughter (that rare one) is our favorite sound, and your smile can brighten even the gloomiest of days (even on days other than you birthdays).

I happened to see a Record breaking Gulab Jamun on the web. Here is the pic and could not but help recollect a Birthday that we ventured to make one ourselves.

Do you remember the time you decided to make Gulab Jamun for the first time on one of the birthdays (was it your 25th one?) We were so confident that we didn’t need a recipe or any guidance from anyone. The dough was mixed and you rolled it into a ball that was the final size of normal Gulab Jamuns that we see in the shops. We ended up with a Football sized Jamun instead of the TT ball sized ones. I will never forget the amount we laughed but nevertheless ended up eating half fried, half sugar syrup soaked Jamun. That day, we learned that making any eatable is indeed a rocket science and not just a wish. In any case, the fun and the memories it created was priceless and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.

PS: Our Jamun would have broken even this world record for sure. We never knew such a record is possible because we were working very hard to finish whatever we made and it took whole of the birthday

Jokes apart, as we celebrate your 56th birthday, I want to thank you for being the amazing woman that you always were. Your love and support have made me a better person, face and overcome what we thought were unsurmountable challenges and I am eternally grateful to the Divine for every moment we’ve shared.

Lovely Relationship – An Architectural Wonder

Thank you for being supportive in everything that I set out to do, some very risky ones too. You made sure that I had a standing in the society, at work and whatever successes I have in my life, I owe it in big measure to you and our children. Making a mark in the society (outside our workspace or family) in this dog eat dog world is never easy for anyone, but then I am not just another “anyone” – I had you as a pillar of strength. How lucky I should consider myself to be. Thanks for being you!

I have said this to many and probably not to you – I thank God for creating you for me & for who you have been and who you are for all of us, ‘An Angel of our World’.

Happiest birthday and wish you many many more to come. As always here is a song that I specially dedicate to the wonderful companion who was born today, just for US! Happy Birthday mere Humsafar!

Thank You-from Happiest man alive

With her becoming better and better, it is becoming increasingly difficult to find words to write this tribute piece to the wonderful soul in my life. Like I said earlier, we are not celebrating her Birthday, but her presence in our lives.

To say that she is like that gift that we keep unwrapping every day of our lives – Someone who never stopped giving to all the kids (and Me). The better half whose missionary zeal to make everyone of us even better is something I never stopped admiring

I am truly at loss (otherwise over verbose) to find positive adjectives to prefix to her name, and gave up after a hour. Thought it is better to attach a thesauraus and still find there were more that could be added. That is the value she brings to the huge family – not just maternal or marital but to the huge extended family that we are so fortunate to possess.

All the DaMaKi family was unanimous in their agreement when I said “Thank you for being with us and for just being you” Personally, I am extremely proud and privileged to be a part of, the one who makes me feel like a hero, every single day for the past 43 years that we know each other (Oh yes, it is that long, and it seems like we just met a few years back for the first time).

She is my biggest fan (beesanige alla). The one who instilled all the confidence in me, when in those rare moments I lost belief in myself. I have gone through those moments and thanks to her presence in my life, those moments were so rare. She pushed, prodded along, and never allowed me to quit.

Not sure if I told this earlier but saying this nevertheless, on a trip abroad, a foreigner whom I met on the flight amidst our chat was shocked (mortified in fact) that I have been married for so many years and remain married to the same person. What is so normal in our part of the world is indeed a rarity there. He wanted to know how the journey has been. Humorously I replied (borrowing from someone more experienced) – “Yes indeed, we have been married for 30 SHORT years and it has been happiest 15 years of my life.” I was not kidding, life has not been without challenges. The co-passenger of my life never allowed me to even think it was a phase of trials and tribulations, ups and downs, elation and grief too. She navigated around all the bumps and waves to hold this vessel steady, ensuring that  we never crashed. Prouder moment for me was when he said – “this is what makes India & its tradition so different from other parts of the world” (INDEED). Thank you Aparna. You are the reason I was able to say that with a lot of conviction.

One of the significant achievement  of my life was my ability to convince Aparna to marry me (I should confess on the side that it is one of the best gifts she got *running*

She means a lot not because she is a perfect person but only because she is a perfect Aparna – That is good enough! On this special day, from all of us, a BIG thank you for being what you are. Have a wonderful day (which we are hoping to make) and a super duper year ahead (which we are hoping to make again)

I cannot sign off without a song dedicated to you. This is at the top of my mind today.

Happy Birthday

May the Divine’s and Gurudev Pujya Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar ji’s blessings be showered on you in abundance