December 21st Apocalypse – Indian scenario

A typical cold morning in NCR. The only speciality is about the fact that the now world famous (alleged) apocalypto might strike Planet Earth (of which, Me & whoever could read are a humble resident). This post is my imagination how the scene would be in Delhi NCR. Let me post a few examples. You are free to post creativity on the comments section below. 🙂

Apocalypse- Pierre Massine
Photo Credits: Apocalypse- Pierre Massine

Now, few possiblities. What if Apocalypto strikes on Indian Standard Time in India? Some scenarios…

  • In Delhi, if it strikes in Lutyen’s, all the OB vans of media would be out in full strength covering the Apocalypse. How would they say these? Let me give you a few instances:

breaking_news_1_

A particular channel which helped Terrorists of 26/11 in Mumbai with their “Live” coverage, would do this: “Our journos are defying the risk to their life and getting this live from “Ground Zero” to you.

NDTV

Another journo famous for shouting from his toes, would have in his debate (as its a Friday) about this. He may say: “How can Apocalypso strike like this without intimating the Government? Nation wants to know…” (Live from Mumbai)

Shouting Anchor
Shouting Anchor

Another channel, where husband & wife are editors, these would be the punch lines. Wife would say: “Apocalypse is Saffron in color. Its a Majority community’s conspiracy.” While the husband would say, sipping his Old Monk, “I think, its a anti-secular conspiracy. It has targeted Minorities. Good night.”

210269-Royalty-Free-RF-Clipart-Illustration-Of-A-News-Anchor-Couple-Seated-At-A-Desk

Another channel, which may have reached at the last, would say: “We covered the Apocalypse first. Sabse Tez…”

  • In Gurgaon, the traffic cops who shout round the clock clearing vehicles creating traffic jams: “Erraaa bo****dika….side karrr…appooocaleeptaa aaraha hai.
  • In Noida, if it strikes in Noida, a particular leader of Uttar Pradesh, would say, “This is against Dalits.”
  • Apocalypse would wait at Toll Plaza, Gurgaon if it plans to strike during Morning rush hour.
  • After crossing Gurgaon Toll plaza, it would get stuck in Shankar Chowk Traffic Jam.
  • I only pity of Apocalypse. Now, a word of caution for Apocalypse beware of Dehi vehicle drivers – especially HR-26, HR-55 & DL registered vehicles.
  • Does Apocalypse has sun control film installed? You need to remove it before it enters Delhi.
  • Once it reaches Haryana, the speed at which of Apocalypse comes down is measured in “litres”. Since potato is measured in inches, milk in Kilos, speed needs to be measured in litres, no? (Today, an MP spoke about a 24″ Potato!)
  • All saas-bahu serials (those TV series that started when I was 10yrs old and still running) and their cries would be blamed on Apocalypse.
  • Once it strikes, a Senior Ruling party leader would address a particular channel / tweet that this Apocalypse is a RSS Conspiracy!
  • Last but not the least, Civil Society would address the media late in the evening and issue statements saying: “IF Janlokpal bill was passed, we could have stopped Apocalypse”
  • After the Apocalypse, a particular minister said, “There was Zero Apocalypse”

All said & done, Apocalypse theory is something which I don’t believe in. We shall surely see 22/12/2012. But, the end would be a beginning to a change at a totally different level. Wait & watch.

66A_dabs&jabs

Comments welcome. This post is purely for fun purpose. Don’t get me 66A please. Or I may need to post a picture of mine. Secondly, I don’t have time for your 66A tamasha. Thanks

Yours sachly,

Shreedharan Raman (Click on the name for more details of the Author)

His Website: http://www.shreedharan.com/

What is in a name?

So great to be back to what I do the worst…. Blogging. There was no particular reason for not jotting down my silly thoughts but attribute it to plain laziness. Lest blogsite kick me out of the place for extended inactivity, decided to put down something. I have inserted a deliberate grammatical error through this blog for obvious reasons. My English teacher may not approve it but america has ceased to be a “Proper” noun for me.

It has been such a “happening” time across the world. Lehmann brothers started it all and everything was a big roller coaster ride, the only difference we only hit the troughs and crests never seem to come at all. World is in a financial mess…american economy has taken an almost “point of no return” beating, the stage managed wars notwithstanding. This just proves that relying on war to boost your financials make bad economic sense atleast in the long term. Then the americans thought they found their messaiah, a panacea for all the ills facing their society in the form of their president elect, barrack obama. But then there were some right wing members of a church who were not convinced that he is christian enough because he did not surrender himself a. la Cassius Clay – Check this out!!!(http://hubpages.com/hub/Barack-What-is-in-a-Name). I am no big fan of anything american much less of obama. Did someone say, he used his perceived disadvantage to its hilt – I am Black, but then where else but in america can these things happen – on his first visit I am waiting for the time he gets introduced to our own Laloo, the sole moral guardian of the country. He, who was worried about Biharis in Mumbai while more Biharis were being raped, murdered and women paraded naked in Bihar itself. Since Railways was his inherited property, he had the temerity to threaten cancellation of trains to protect the Non-resident Biharis. By the way, he had a NAME makeover from Lalu to Laloo to bring him even better luck.

But then the bane of the modern world is the “NAME” – calling that people indulge in. NAME of Philosophy, NAME of people, NAME of civilization, NAME of religion, NAME of God – any NAME is enough to cause the next “yet to be NAMEd” world war. In the part of the world that I live in “Secularism” is another NAME used to divide the great Nation called India (Great despite the recession in the world – hey! we lost the least number of jobs, never saw any person shooting themselves or others due to depression). And this despite the doomsday predictions of hackneyed Media (proves who are their real masters, they just extrapolate their news theory from their western masters to India which proved everyone wrong).

Isn’t NAME important? I cannot imagine myself being known by another NAME – I am sure I would become less lovable or adorable to myself. Like the learned Bard said, “Rose by any other NAME would just smell as sweet” – Pardon him, the “NAMERS” of thw world for he had not seen the genetically modified roses. The real trigger was a mail from my friend call him “X” for want of easy to remember NAME, in the Gulf who recently was being troubled by his friend, let us NAME him, “Y” who embraced another religion (yeah, another NAME, little realizing that NAME of the religion does not matter, every religion says the same stuff). But then!!! this friend retained his original NAME despite the conversion. NAME is important…eh (heights of possessiveness, just like me ) Out of desperation, “X” sought advise on another forum asking the members to help him counter “Y”. Here was my reply (of course, cannot be attributed as original work to my NAME – but then NAME does not matter and the stuff matters, isnt it? especially when it comes to me). Copyright: No one dare copy this without my express permission Signed under my NAME (though it is not my original)

On a serious note, I love and thank my friend NAME: Charles Gibson from Spain for this post: thanks Charlie (sorry for changing the NAME)

Three men, one English, one Arab and one Indian were walking together and came to a pool of water. The Englishman said ‘lets drink some water’. Then the Arab said ‘That is not water, it is الماء. Lets drink some الماء.’ Then the Indian said ‘Nonsense, its jala. Lets drink some jala.’ So the argument began and all went thirsty.

We are fools to argue over NAMES while we go thirsty. The important thing is to drink the water. What it is called or the path we take to reach the spring are irrelevant. What is important is the essence of the meaning of each NAME, the objective of each path. In human life the essence of all paths is eventually to arrive at the Truth, to realise the Self. Even if this search for God is unconscious in some and conscious in others, it is going on in all none the less.

We argue over and place one term or philosophy over another, because we are still attached to NAMES and forms. The essence is beyond this, so each NAME, each form, each philosophy, each religion has its rightful place. For one man, who approaches with rational knowledge, some philosophies might be considered as a higher truth and others as a lower truth. To another, who measures by love or feeling, this might be reversed. This is useful for each man to find his best way to prepare to realise the Self. However if this relative distinction of higher and lower truth for each man is mistaken for an absolute truth, again we are plunged into ignorance.

One man might read nondual philosophy and have no understanding of it, then he might go to the temple and realise the Self, after devoting himself to a deity. Another man might feel nothing in the temple and through sheer depth of knowledge prepare himself to realise the Self. Each man, if he has realized the Self, will not then turn to the other and argue. He will rather have sated his thirst for God.

So, we can recognize in this way, that any apparent conflict of philosophy or opinion is only our own ignorance. A man who knows the Self sees no conflict. Go to that place, don’t tarry on the path and throw stones at your fellow travelers. We are that which is infinite, perfect and completely one.

Lovely, wasn’t it?
Well until I find time and mood (and a NAME) for my next blog… Ciao

Racism makes good Business sense

Got thinking about the Celebrity Big Brother reality show controversy. Was this all a stage managed event to boost up the TRP or what for layman is called the Viewership. For me it made a lot of business sense in whatever happened. Everyone concerned were in it for money. An out of work Indian Actor, a Reality show with sagging fortune all just got what they wished. This actor who was no better than an arm twisting persona (whose family was embroiled in a controversy for employing some thugs a few years back to settle scores with a rival) has no bloody moral right to clear or absolve Jade Goody of racism charge, her flip-flop on the issue took away any credibility she had. Considering the way she behaved during and after the controversy, I wish it should have been real and she should have been abused for her cheap behaviour . I again maintain that the whole thing was stage managed for publicity. The whole thing seemed fair to this cheap Actor when she won the show and the big bucks to the extent she is ready to plead to every Indian on behalf of Goody (no Goody) to forgive her. Atleast my fair lady, the citizenry of India with even a bit of brain left never felt offended – so keep the tears for your onscreen shows (which never seemed to come till this issue came along as a great gift to revive your fortune)

Shilpa Shetty knew what was in store when she signed on. She knew she was being paid to get verbally (physically too?) abused and the game was all about how you withstood this onslaught. She surely couldn’t have expected them to treat her with a traditional welcome with Kalash, Deep and Arti. C’mon this was a reality show and everyone was supposed to be at their nastiest worst. Reading through what transpired during the show, felt there was nothing that called for involvement of the Prime Minister of UK, Finance Minister of India – My God!!! this is height (or rather Pits…) All these politicians need to just look at their own backyards to realize what really constitutes Racism. What they all did was hardselling the program by their unwitting involvement or were they bought to boost the program ratings  To make the whole scenario comical, an official ad welcoming Jade Goody to visit India (I cant help laughing my guts out) and for a few days our journalist had nothing but track the progress of her visa application.

Let us look at ourselves on this issue first. Isn’t India with its Caste based society racist too? The Finance Minister who was in support of the bill passed by the cabinet also is a racist because he supported division of society based on their origin (or based on the caste of the family into which a person was born). For more evidence look for any matrimonial ads, looking for fair skin of a particular caste, denomination etc. For me this is racism of the highest order. Don’t we fall head over heels for fair skinned or rich people and look down on the opposite valued people. So dear Finance Minister, you have something better to do than release your books or defend a cheap actor who was out on a publicity stunt. I guess she has her ways to settle her problems (including employing some thugs which has some experience anyway) Let us set our own homes in order. I have seen people in my city (Oh yes, home state of our revered FM) referring to people from the North East as “Chinky” and asking them if they eat dog meat etc – this stereotyping is racism too. Similarly usage of the terms Madrasis – we have examples galore in our day to day life. Have you watched an ad on TV, where West Indian Cricketer says, it is tough to be a West Indian in India (subtle hint that Indians looked down upon the color of their dark skin). These spots were irritatingly regular during the recently concluded Cricket Series.

So while the Celebrity Big Brother crew and participants walk to the bank, let us get back to our mundane lives.